Sunday, March 15, 2009

TODD MARTINEZ vs FACEBOOK



I thought this was hilarious, it's from Todd's blog. I was saying the same thing about Facebook a while ago but Todd puts in a more bitchin' manner.

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I don’t know about this facebook shit. I just recently made a facebook dizzel and I found out all sorts of stuff about my friends, and a bunch of other mfkas, that I didn’t know or didn’t really need to know. This thing actually eavesdrops on everybody’s business for you. Tom and Kelly got butt nekkid in the park last night. Bill said Brandie is a scandalous ho. Justin told Sarah he wasn’t gonna beat them cakes up until she washes her funky ass. I’m just saying I might not necessarily need to know all that shit. Don’t even bother looking at my page. All it says is Todd just ate Wings n Things. Todd just ate some more Wings n Things. Todd watched NBA TV. Todd went to his paintball store. Todd came home and watched NBA TV while he ate Wings n Things pizza. If it updated when I got explosive diahrrea, then I might have to cancel my account. Girls are crazy. I remember when everyone just had pagers. A girl would page a mfka, and when he didn’t call…”Why you don’t call me when I page you?! I know you were out with ol girl!” Then cell phones hit…”I called you fifty times in a row!! I know you were out with ol girl’s triflin ass!” Then the technological manleash artists basically put a computer in every guy’s back pocket…”I called. I texted. I emailed yo ass. Imma find your location and google maps yo mfknass! I know you out with ol girl!” Nowadays there is just no escape…”I called, texted, emailed, visual voicemailed, myspaced, gps’d, then I checked facebook and saw that you woke up, put on your shoes, ate three pieces of toast, kicked my cat you are supposed to be watchin, took ol girl’s panties off your head and came over here tryin to get some sugar, kiss my ass mfka!” Thanks Facebook.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Too funny and oh so true. Here`s what to do, don`t make a facebook account. The cell phone issue, yeah, hard one there. Need it but sure as hell puts a leash on your ass; how many times can you claim the battery went dead or you forgot it in your car, especially since you seem to have the thing attached to your ear anytime you`re seen. Thank god the ol`my hearing isn`t what it used to be` is so hard to disprove.

MDavor said...

Todd for the president

SEBURO said...

I was therein the players room when Todd 'spat the dummy'* after Chuck Hench slapped a ban on him for "unsportsman like behavior" on the field.

AND IT WAS THE FUNNIEST FUCKING I EVER SAW.


*Aussie slag for 'really pissed off'