Thursday, April 16, 2009


A few weeks ago this guy +6581580152 SMSed (text messaged) me out of the blue and asked if I was selling "paintball gun".

There has been a spat of incidents whereby some people got the impression that some of us are selling paintball markers illegally in Singapore. Some people have been snooping around and trying to check if we were really doing it. 

Unfortunately they were not very smart at going about trying to smoke us. Not that there was anything to smoke out.

+6581580152: Hi there are you selling paintball gun in sg.
WTF??! Where this is come from?

ME: I not selling anything in Singapore - how did you get my number?

+6581580152: Oh I saw it on street directory so are you selling a paintball gun?
Street directory?? That was such a lousy lie - this is starting to smell like bacon.

I tried to call his number but he didnt pick up.

+6581580152: sorry boss I can only reply messages I cannot answer my phone.
Yeah I know if I talk to you over the phone I would have blown your cover in a sec. You cannot use the net to dig for answers fast enough if you were talking to me over the phone. 

ME: I am not a dealer. I am selling my 07 Cyborg but its in Malaysia.

+6581580152: So are you selling a paintball gun?

ME: Obviously you don't know what a Cyborg is. I said I am selling my marker but not in Singapore. I will not sell it in Singapore nor will I bring it in to sell.

+6581580152: Why is that?

ME: Because you need a firearm licence to own a paintball marker in Singapore.

+6581580152: I see.

He loses interest and stops messaging me. I guess that the answer I gave him wasnt something he was looking for. If he was a cop - there would be nothing for him to go on because I read him the law.

I want till a week later and I decide to screw with him so I sent him a SMS

ME: Are you CID?
(Criminal Investigation Division)

+6581580152: Yes
I was about to tell him that no one in Singapore is dumb enough to sell markers to anonymous liars in Singapore he replies:

+6581580152: No la I am not CID really. Who is this by the way?

He's forgotten who I am. Nice I can screw with him.

ME: I think you are police.

+6581580152: Anyway I cannot reveal my identity but who are you?
He thinks I am a stupid as him - I never reply.

3 weeks later I use Starhub's (Telco) Web SMS from which you can send SMS from their website to a subscribers phone and it was free. I took a chance and hoped that his number was a StarHub number and turns out that it is.

BOB: You looking for a paintball gun? what is your budget?

+6581580152: But i was looking for one in sg

BOB: what type?
This was the big test

+6581580152: I dun really know about paintball guns but the the normal paintball gun which the one you use when you play in sg
Why would you want to spend a lot of money on "something you don't really know"? I know most kiasu Singaporeans would research a $250 camera to death before buying it

BOB:"Normal" is like saying I want to buy a "car". There are many models and types. Where did you play in Singapore - I will know the model you played with.
He takes a long time to reply. He doesn't know what type of marker, the name of the marker nor does he know where he played paintball. Obviously the guy has never even played paintball at all.

+6581580152: Ok i check the model then i tell you ok
Nice cop out standard answer. trying to not give away that he has never played paintball much less held a paintball marker.

BOB: why you want to buy one anyway? you cant use it anywhere in singapore no field will let you play. you wont have any access to air or c02

+6581580152: Ya true also but its really fun ah
spoken like a 10 year old.

+6581580152: Air or c02 is

BOB: the propellant. you have not told me where you play. name the field you played at.
He takes a long time to reply. Probably frantically searching online for names of paintball fields in Singapore.

BOB: you dont know anything about paintball do you?
I closed the SMS at that.

Ends. Tune in next week when I scew with him further.

In the mean time feel free to send him an SMS here - its free and untraceable. Just don't use the same BOB.


CALGAR said...


c.y said...

way to go BOB!!!

MDavor said...

figures.. he has to be a cop. He is dumb :D

Arthur C. US/TW said...

im going to text him from US or TW and tell him not only i can get markers..but AK's,.. AR's... sig 557, and misc hand guns... im sure he'll think he will get a freaking promotion for cracking this big case.



SEBURO said...

oh please do it.

I already have my next round of prank smss ready for next week.

MDavor said...

haha you do that... I'll die from laughing ;D